I THINK I AM

She's who I thought I was.
I felt more myself,
more real and alive than ever.
Yet I was walking right into
my own demise.

She's who I thought I was,
and I loved her,
yet I hated her all the same.
I couldn't stand my own existence
in a constant state of ambivalence.

Now I've abandoned myself
to embrace myself-
yet another version
of my truth.
I think I'm someone different,
someone new.

Yet I still miss her
and I'll always love her-
the girl I thought i was.
Because she will always be
a part of my fragmented soul.

But I'll stay away from her,
because at least I don't hate
or fear
the girl I see today as much
if at all.